Lawsuit commercials for personal injury are quite common with things like accidents and medication; however they never mention Chuck Norris.
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Chuck Norris once went to court for a crime, the judge pleaded guilty.
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Chuck Norris was once charged with three attempted murders in Boulder County, but the Judge quickly dropped the charges because Chuck Norris does not "attempt" murder.
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Chuck Norris can hear pictures.
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When Chuck Norris was in middle school, his English teacher assigned an essay:
"What is courage?" He received an A+ for turning in a blank page with only his name at the top.
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Q: What's the difference between a dead dog in the road and a dead lawyer in the road?
A: There are skid marks in front of the dog.
Chuck Norris doesn't climb trees.
He just pulls them down and walks on top of them.
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There are two types of people in the world... people that suck, and Chuck Norris.
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A meteor did not kill the dinosaurs, Chuck Norris just went on a hunting trip.
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Why don’t lawyers enjoy fishing?
Because it’s too much like work, what with all the lying involved.
Discussion between two future lawyers:
I don’t understand why they rejected me!
I told them that I want to be a lawyer because I respect the law, that I’d give my life for the Constitution and that I want justice for my clients.
What did you tell them?
I told them that I want to be a lawyer because of my hands!
You’re hands?
What do you mean?
Well, I looked in my hands and there were no money...