Q: What do computers and air conditions have in common?
A: They're both become useless when you open windows.
Vote:
A proton and a neutron are walking down the street.
The proton says, "Wait, I dropped an electron help me look for it."
The neutron says "Are you sure?"
The proton replies "I'm positive."
Helium walks into a bar.
The bartender says "We don't serve noble gasses in here."
Helium doesn't react.
Q: Why do accountants make good lovers?
A: They're great with figures.
Vote:
Q: What do you do with a sick chemist?
A: If you can't helium, and you can't curium, then you might as well barium.
Q: What did the scientist say when he found 2 isotopes of helium?
A: HeHe
Two chemists go into a restaurant.
The first one says "I think I'll have an H2O."
The second one says "I think I'll have an H2O too" - and he died.
Two antennas met on a roof, fell in love and got married.
The ceremony wasn’t much, but the reception was excellent.
Vote:
If you're not part of the solution, you're part of the precipitate.
Two students talk:
"What are you reading?"
"Quantum physics theory book."
"But why are you reading it upside-down?"
"It makes no difference anyway."