If a tree falls in the woods and no one is around to hear it, a hipster will buy it on vinyl.
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I'm so hipster, even I've never heard of my favorite band.
Q: What do you get if you cross a fridge and a hipster playlist?
A: Cool music!
Chuck Norris can make sounds come out on his Air Guitar.
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Chuck Norris can listen to 24 hours worth of music and not move a single muscle.
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Why couldn't Usain Bolt listen to his music?
"Because he broke the record."
Chuck Norris can make a rap video without booties and cars.
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Taylor Swift waved at a boy yesterday and he didn't wave back...
So she will have a new album coming out tomorrow.
A man cheats on his girlfriend named Lorraine with a girl named Clearly.
Suddenly, Lorraine died.
At the funeral, the man stands up and sings, "I can see Clearly now, Lorraine is gone."
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Kind of surprised hipsters haven't started tying their beard's in man buns yet.