Usain Bolt is so fast I saw a Cheetah giving him a High 5.
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Peter: Why was the Olympian not able to listen to music?
Matthew: Why?
Peter: Because he broke the record!
Fan: "I see you won a silver medal at the Olympics. What's it for?¨"
Athlete: "It's for telling knock knock jokes."
Fan: "And what's that gold medal for?"
Athlete: "For stopping."
Vote:
"I have the body of an athlete."
"Better give it back. You're getting it out of shape."
Light was heard saying to his son, "Keep practicing and one day you will be faster than the speed of Usain."
So I heard the reason Usain Bolt is so fast is because his offseason training consists of going back home and hitting on dudes.
Vote:
What did the mooron say when he saw the milk cartons in the grass?
"Hey! Look at the cow's nest!"
Two girl sprinters are training for the 100 metres race.
One says to the other: "You won't believe this, but I've just run 100 metres in 10 seconds."
The other says: "But that's impossible, that's the world record."
So the other says: "Ah hah, but I took a short cut."
What's yellow, comes from Peru, and is completely unknown?
Waterloo Bear, Paddington Bear's forgotten cousin.
What happened to the lost cattle?
Nobody's herd.