"I have the body of an athlete."
"Better give it back. You're getting it out of shape."
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Oh, you play racquetball?
You must be extremely athletic.
Jamaica has named Usain Bolt its Sportsman of the Year.
In related news, the island has also made Michael Phelps an honorary citizen.
Jack: "What's the name of the fastest dinosaur at the Olympics?"
Jill: "I haven't a clue. What?"
Jack: "Prontosaurus."
Peter: Why was the Olympian not able to listen to music?
Matthew: Why?
Peter: Because he broke the record!
You're not alone.
Sometimes, even Usain Bolt feels like he's running in circles.
Q: Why was the blonde jogging backwards?
A: She wanted to gain weight!
Q: If athletes get athlete's foot, what do elves get?
A: Mistle-toes!
A javelin thrower called Vicky
Found the grip of her javelin sticky.
When it came to the throw
She couldn't let go.
Making judging the distance quite tricky.
Who was the fastest runner?
Adam.
He was first in the human race.
An elderly patient needs a heart transplant and discusses his options with his doctor.
The doctor says, ‘We have three possible donors.
One is a young, healthy athlete.
The second is a middleaged businessman who never drank or smoked, and the third is an attorney who just died after practising law for 30 years.’
‘I’ll take the lawyer’s heart,’ says the patient.
‘Why?’ asks the doctor.
The patient replies, ‘It’s never been used.’