Chuck Norris can use a Shake Weight without looking gay.
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Chuck Norris has 5 bathtubs, they are known as the Great Lakes.
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When Chuck Norris breaks the speed limit, no one can put it back together again.
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They have traced the Gay Gene all the way back to the time of the Dinosaurs.
They found two distinct species.
They have named them Lickalotapus and Megasoreass.
Q: How can you tell if you're in a gay church?
A: Only half the congregation is kneeling.
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Michael Jordan is the greatest basketball player of all-time because Chuck Norris never played.
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A hippie walks on a bus and sees a nun.
Being the straight forward kind of guy he is, he says "Hey baby, want to have sex?"
The nun says "God no!" so she gets off the bus angry.
When the hippie is about to get off the bus, the bus driver asks him "Hey man.
you see that graveyard across the street?" The hippie go's "yeah I see it, what about it?"
"well every Tuesday night at 8:30. the nun go's to the top of the hill to pray.
If you dress up as a ghost, and tell her to have sex with you, she'll have too"
The hippie replied "sweet!" So Tuesday night comes and the hippie has a ghost costume, 8:30 comes and here comes the nun.
The hippie pops out and says
"I am the ghost of a man buried here, and I command you to have sex with me!"
The nun go's "Well... ok, but I have a virgins aspect so it has to be oral"
So the nun and the hippie have oral sex and the hippie runs away and says "Ha, ha I was actually the hippie" and the nun said "Ha, ha I'm actually the bus driver!"
Chuck Norris does infinit loops in 4 seconds.
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Underneath China it says "Made in Chuck Norris".
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The energizer bunny freezes when it sees Chuck Norris.
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