Joke #1656

How many cops does it take to screw in a light bulb? Just one, but he is never around when you need him.

How many cops does it take to change a lightbulb? None. They just beat the room for being black.

A cop once pulled Chuck Norris over...Luckily, the cop left only with a warning.

Q: How many corporate attorneys does it take to change a light bulb? A: Who knows, you need 250 just to lobby for the research grant.

Three blondes are sitting by the side of a river holding fishing poles with the lines in the water. A Game Warden comes up behind them, taps them on the shoulder and says, “Excuse me, ladies, I’d like to see your fishing licenses.” “We don’t have any,” replied the first blonde. “Well, if you’re going to fish, you need fishing licenses,” said the Game Warden. “But officer,” replied the second blonde, “we aren’t fishing. We all have magnets at the end of our lines and we’re collecting debris off the bottom of the river.” The Game Warden lifted up all the lines and, sure enough, there were horseshoe magnets tied on the end of each line. “Well, I know of no law against it,” said the Game Warden. “Take all the debris you want.” And with that, he left. As soon as the Game Warden was out of sight, the three blondes started laughing hysterically. “What a dumb Fish Cop,” the second blonde said to the other two. “Doesn’t he know that there are steelhead trout in this river?”

Q: How many hipsters does it take to screw in a lightbulb? A: One to screw it in and the other to wear skinny jeans.

Q: How many hipsters does it take to screw in a light bulb? A: Dude, the light bulb was cooler before it changed.

Q: How many hipsters does it take to screw in a lightbulb? A: You wouldn't know, it's kind of an obscure number.

A man was made the police chief in a nudist colony. He liked the job, but putting on the badge was murder!

How many cops does it take to screw in a light bulb? None, it turned itself in.

Q: How many lawyers does it take to change a light bulb? A: "How many can you afford?"