Chuck Norris threw rocks into the ocean and named them Hawaii
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If Chuck Norris was on Minute to Win it, they would need 59 seconds of filler.
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Chuck Norris looks at IEDs and the trigger man blows up.
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Chuck Norris can throw a house through a window.
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Cars were invented to have a faster way of fleeing from Chuck Norris.
Not to be outdone, Chuck Norris invented the car accident.
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The Earth does NOT revolve around the Sun.
The Earth is stationary.
The Sun follows Chuck Norris as he makes his daily jog around the Earth.
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Before his rise to fame, Jaws was Chuck Norris's goldfish.
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Chuck Norris once wrestled a thirty foot snake, and then he realized he was just masturbating.
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Chuck Norris doesn't moon walk, the moon Chuck-Norris Walks.
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When everyone else can't, Chuck Norris CAN.
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Chuck Norris once gave a cop a ticket for speeding.
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