Chuck Norris is a hunter.
But Chuck Norris does not hunt.
That implies the possibility of failure.
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Chuck Norris does not hunt because the word hunting infers the probability of failure.
Chuck Norris goes killing.
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A meteor did not kill the dinosaurs, Chuck Norris just went on a hunting trip.
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Demons don't hunt Chuck Norris...
He is hunting them!
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Chuck Norris doesn't bug hunt as that signifies a probability of failure, he goes bug killing.
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A deer hunter asked his Pastor if it was a sin to hunt on Sunday.
"From what I hear about your aim," said the Pastor, "It's a sin for you to hunt anytime."
Chuck Norris gave birth to himself because nobody else is capable (or could even live) to give birth to Chuck Norris.
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A deer hunter was bragging about the biggest, baddest, handsomest, heaviest deer he'd bagged the day before.
"It's got enough meat to eat the whole year," he boasted.
Just then the Game Warden came up and cited the man $500 for hunting without the proper tag.
"Five-hundred dollars?" exclaimed the hunter.
"All for a mangy, skinny, stubby, half-pint deer?"
Chuck Norris takes a meteor shower.
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Chuck Norris was the fourth wise man, who gave baby Jesus the gift of beard, which he carried with him until he died.
The other three wise men were enraged by the preference that Jesus showed to Chuck's gift, and arranged to have him written out of the bible.
All three died soon after of mysterious roundhouse-kick related injuries.
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Note to self:
Don’t be the cashier to tell Chuck Norris his coupons have expired.
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