The results of a recent Harris Poll on "what's scarier" forced the Discovery channel to cancel Shark week in lieu of Chuck Norris week.
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Chuck Norris put humpty dumpty back together again, only to roundhouse kick him in the face.
Later Chuck dined on scrambled eggs with all the king's horses and all the king's men.
The king himself could not attend for unspecified reasons.
Coincidentally, the autopsoy revealed the cause of death to be a roundhouse kick to the face.
There is only one King.
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Chuck Norris can ski up a mountain.
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Chuck Norris can drink an entire gallon of milk in forty-seven seconds.
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Chuck Norris won the World Horseshoe Pitching Contest while they were still attached to a Clydesdale.
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Some people like to eat frogs' legs.
Chuck Norris likes to eat lizard legs.
Hence, snakes.
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Whiteboards are white because Chuck Norris scared them that way.
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The first time Chuck Norris won a game of poker was when his apponant reaveled his full house; then Chuck Norris reaveled his roundhouse.
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Chuck Norris beat the light speed by 2 hours and 23 minutes.
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There is only one award higher than the medal of Honor: The Chuck Norris Medal of Roundhouse.
No mortal man has ever earned it.
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Chuck Norris counted to infinity - twice.
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