Father's Day always worried James.
He was afraid that he will get a gift he can't afford.
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Happy Father's Day!
I got you a present but if you want to get technical then technically you bought it.
By the way, can I borrow $20?
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"Dad, your Father's Day gift is another year of not having to pay for my wedding."
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What is the perfect Father's Day gift?
Taking your Mom away on a vacation with you.
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Mothers have Mother's Day and fathers have Father's Day.
What do single guys have?
Palm Sunday.
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By tradition, fathers wear a red flower on Father's Day, if their father is alive and a white flower if he's dead.
And if they have a nagging wife and a house full of screaming kids, they wear a pink flower - which means they are living but wish they were dead.
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Happy Father's Day to someome who's been completely replaced in his marriage by Fifty Shades of Grey.
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Please let me know in advance if you want to invite any secret love children to your Father's Day brunch.
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What does a blonde in a supermarket bending over?
Looking for low prices!
Johnny collected lots of money from trick or treating and he went to the candy store to buy some chocolate. ' You should give that money to charity,' said the shopkeeper.
'No, I'll buy the chocolate. You give the money to charity!'
A deer hunter was bragging about the biggest, baddest, handsomest, heaviest deer he'd bagged the day before.
"It's got enough meat to eat the whole year," he boasted.
Just then the Game Warden came up and cited the man $500 for hunting without the proper tag.
"Five-hundred dollars?" exclaimed the hunter.
"All for a mangy, skinny, stubby, half-pint deer?"