Q: What kind of music do elves like best?
A: "Wrap" music!
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A: Who sings "Blue Christmas" and makes toy guitars?
A: Elfis!
A boy washed with his mum in the bathroom and saw her vagina and asks:
"what the hell is this".
"It is called a cave" replied the mother.
The next day he washed with his father and saw his dick and asks
"what the heck is this".
"This is called little Johnny".
The next day he went to school and his teacher was mad that he came late to school so she told him to sing a song.
He started to sing
"when the black clouds came out of the mountain little Johnny ran into the cave."
One elf said to another elf, "We had Grandma for Christmas dinner".
And the other elf said, "Really? We had turkey!"
Q: Why did Santa's helper see the doctor?
A: Because he had low "elf" esteem!
Q: What is Father Christmas's tax status?
A: Elf-employed.
Santa rides in a sleigh.
What do elves ride in?
Mini vans!
Chuck Norris is the reason why George Michael is never gonna dance again.
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Apple pays Chuck Norris 99 cents every time he listens to a song.
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What do you call an elf who tells silly jokes?
A real Christmas Card!