Why did the bareback performer ride his horse?
Because it got too heavy to carry.
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A guy enters a bar carrying an alligator.
Says to the patrons, "Here’s a deal.
I'll open this alligator's mouth and place my genitals inside.
The gator will close his mouth for one minute, then open it, and I'll remove my unit unscathed.
If it works, everyone buys me drinks."
The crowd agrees.
The guy drops his pants and puts his privates in the gator's mouth.
Gator closes mouth.
After a minute, the guy grabs a beer bottle and bangs the gator on the top of its head.
The gator opens wide, and he removes his genitals unscathed. Everyone buys him drinks.
Then he says: "I'll pay anyone $100 who's willing to give it a try."
After a while, a hand goes up in the back of the bar.
It's a woman.
"I'll give it a try," she says, "but you have to promise not to hit me on the head with the beer bottle."
How do you make a cat be a dog?
Pour gasoline on it and light it with a match.
It will go 'WOOF.'
Why does a chicken lay eggs?
Because if she dropped them, they’d break.
Chuck Norris once uppercut a horse and that is how the giraffe was created.
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Q: What does an elephant use as tampon?
A: A sheep.
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Q: What is the difference between an alligator and a crocodile?
A: One says "See you later" and the other says "In a while".
What do you call a herd of cows in a psychiatrists office?
An encownter group.
Q: What do you call a gay dinosaur?
A: Megasoreass.
Knock, knock.
Who's there?
Kanga.
Kanga who?
Actually, it's kangaroo!
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