Chuck Norris never reads the News – because Chuck Norris IS the News.
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Chuck Norris can breath out with his nose and breath in with his mouth at the same time.
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Chuck Norris didn't have a mum or dad, he created himself.
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Chuck Norris can win an argument with his wife.
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Aliens fear that Chuck Norris might abduct them.
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Chuck Norris knows who's buried in Grant's Tomb.
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God created universe, Chuck Norris created God.
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Oxygen needs Chuck Norris to survive.
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Chuck did enter the Dragon.
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When Chuck Norris enters a room, he doesn't turn the lights on, he turns the dark off
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When Chuck Norris opens a bag of Doritos, it's fucking full!
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